Monday, October 7, 2013

Precious Moments II

Have you ever looked at a close friend and thought, "She looks different. I don't know how exactly, but definitely different." You , always tactful, say, "You look great. Did you do something to your hair.?" Or, "Your make-up is different. I love it." You may suspect your friend had a bit of work done, but you can't ask. Asking would be breaching an age old social contract that reads: an individual who has had plastic surgery may freely disclose it to whomever she chooses, but you may NEVER inquire of anyone whether they have succumbed to the knife. You may speculate with other friends as to whether or not there's been an eye lift and, if so, whether it was a good one or a bad one,but asking is taboo. As young as sixteen, we knew the rules. When Merel and Andrea returned from summer vacation with pig snouts, we giggled, but never asked. When undershirt Libby disappeared from class and returned 3 weeks later with perfect C cups, we remained mum (and envious.) In case you're wondering, the above is a lead in to a "precious moment." My close friend, T., whom I've know for 25 years, met me for lunch. She ordered the tilapia with black bean sauce that she had been raving about for days. The server put it in front of her and she ignored it. Instead, she stared at me as if seeing me for the first time. For a second she said nothing. Never letting her gaze depart from my face, she said, "Did you have a nose job?" I wasn't sure whether to be more flabbergasted by the question or by the fact that her tilapia was getting cold. I have nothing against plastic surgery for others. Those who have it it(Mary Tyler Moore and Joan Rivers aside) look better and younger. I, on the other hand, am peculiarly averse to pain. And to endure pain to look like a younger version of me, seems particularly pointless. If plastic surgery could make me look like Scarlet Johansson, I'd willingly become a morphine addict. Back to my nose. I wasn't sure if she was asking me if I'd ever had a nose job or had recently had a nose job. I didn't ask. Either way the answer was "no." What I did say was "Why do you ask?" I knew there were several possible answers to this question and I was angling for the one that said, "Because you have such a cute little nose." The one I got, however, was, "Because your upper lip goes up and your nostrils are long. I never noticed before." Tact and social contracts serve a purpose.

No comments:

Post a Comment